The father is always accused in TV series; To have a healthy family, the father must be healthy!

Mehr News Agency – Department of Religion and Thought – Sayeda Fatemeh Sadat Kiaei: In the small, but important institution of the family, people and their position are defined by the roles they carry, the mother in the family system has the role of education and the creator of a calm and positive atmosphere for the growth of the members, and the cohesion and integration of the family is determined by the mother's thoughtfulness and thought. and the father, in the position of leadership and management, bears the heavy responsibility of consistency and support. He is the one who takes care of the family members and provides the needs of the family with activities outside the home. In the educational sources, the father is likened to the pillar of the tent and the pillar of the house are which shows his sensitive position in the figure get A healthy family and his duties towards his wife and children.

Although the issue of raising children in the family has been discussed more than the role of the mother, the role of the father can also be examined and noted. In addition to the important responsibilities that they have in meeting the financial and basic needs of the family, fathers also have a special place in the education of their children, an issue that is discussed on the occasion of the birth of Hazrat Ali (A) And Father's Day is the focus of a conversation with “Hamid Abdollahi”, a seminarian researcher, and he addressed the position of the father in the Iranian family, the dimensions and components of the father's education. this is. You can read the results of this interview below.

How much is our educational atmosphere today and the place that was formed by the father in the society compared to the atmosphere that Ahl al-Bayt (A) drawn from an ideal Islamic society are is it close Where are we located?

2 points should not be forgotten, firstly, our present time is an extension of the past time, while the manifestations and facilities have changed, secondly, if there are disturbances in our lifestyle today and some values ​​have changed, becoming modern means separating or falling away It is not from the teachings of the Qur'an and Ahl al-Bayt. This change of values ​​happens in every period and time, so we should not blame the present time.

If we go back to religious teachings, we will understand what values ​​existed in different periods and what factors have changed these values ​​and lifestyles. If we achieve and adhere to these values ​​in our time, even if the lifestyle changes, the values ​​will not change.

What are these values ​​in defining the father's role and did we stick to it or not?

This introduction needs to be said, it seems that as stated in the Qur'an, human creation, social fabric, divine traditions and instincts that have been entrusted to human beings are permanent and do not change in all eras, that is, the one who created the world and sent the book. This has given an important explanation, wherever you live and wherever you are on the earth, there is a principle and there are structures that do not change. For example, fatherhood and paternal or maternal feelings in the family and their emotions do not change, and this is the general principle of the Qur'an.
Therefore, we can measure ourselves in any period and place with these values ​​and standards.

anywhere It is about the father, it is about authenticity

Now let's see what are the originals? Whether they are defined in a specific lifestyle, a specific environment, and specific relationships are general issues. If we can extract the pure principles, it can be applied in any period. For example, if we now want to see the position of the father in ancient and post-Islamic Iran, we will notice that each period assigns a special position to the father, even though there is more talk about the role of the mother in the texts and sources.

It seems that in the religious perspective, there is a type of religion that is a part of it and an important part of this type of father. If this position, which is defined in relation to the rest of the parts, is changed for any reason, the person will leave that position or fall behind those orders.

The concept of father in the Quran and traditions or even the history of ancient Iran is associated with authenticity. Whenever there is talk of father, there is also talk of authenticity. In most world literature, people are known by the name of father, the name of people in pre-Islamic Iran was also known as father. Or in the matter of epistemology and religion, talking about religion in the Qur'an father And ancestors are mentioned. Even when it comes to polytheism and polytheism, it is still about the religion of the father father And the ancestors are spoken.

Father, protection and security

Another concept that religion deals with is the father's protection, security and protection. Both in Islamic culture and in Iranian culture, this position has existed.

The origin of the family in different cultures begins when a man, as a male, intends to form a family, in religious literature and the Qur'an, according to Qawamun Ali. Alansa Paying attention to the formation of a family and assigning this social responsibility to the man, as in the tradition of Iranians and other ethnic groups, the formation of a family begins with courtship and the desire of a man, this desire leads to the formation of a family, and at this time the role of a father begins.

As the mother is the center of the family, the starting point and origin of the family is from a person who later becomes a father with the birth of children. In the future, the spiritual, security and financial support is left to the father. A father uses all his capacities to protect his wife and children and this duty is assigned to him, it is not a matter of choice or he cannot avoid it.

How is this role in education?

Let's go back to the puzzle that I gave as an example at the beginning. In the educational discussion, the role of the father is placed next to the family members, that is, all the members are complementary to each other, it is important that the complementary roles are such that the position of the father's authority is maintained for the children and the children are obedient.

Islam has given special attention to the fathers regarding the girl child

All this is keeping in mind that Islam pays special attention to fathers, especially in the case of female children, when there is an ignorant custom of killing girls in some Arabs and forbids them from doing this, and where the special attention and place for Fathers of daughters believe. This sort of thing, despite the fact that it has raised the father's credit standing, but against all odds control no It prevents dominance. How do we know? From the warnings that Islam gives about having a daughter and the recommendations that are related to Daughters He says, in fact, the authority of the father finds a special definition.

Today, what is the biggest gap in the field of the educational role of fathers?

In the 1970s, a series was broadcast called Pedresalar, which reflected a generational break. This series showed the failure of patriarchy, but the way solution which showed was a riot, after that every series that was made, the father played the role of a normal person and even became a person who is always accused. In new programs, it is also a source of humor. Not that we are against humor, no, but it is wrong to be the subject of laughter.

anywhere to feminism and filial piety We got infected, which means the roles are messed up

Islam is against patriarchy, feminism, and filial piety, because Islam has determined a place for everyone. What caused the formation of a wrong view in the later periods, where the father was seen as a bank card and was reduced to the role of mere support and financial provision, was the failure to see the father's position of authority in the family. This financing literature has spread to cyber space and communication between men and women, boys and girls, and some are looking for financial providers for their economic needs instead of looking for a life partner.

If today, like every other century, we see disturbances in the society, it is due to the neglect of this definition of the place in the family. The proportions are messed up and it has made the person unable to play his full role. In any period that is related to feminism and filial piety We get infected, it shows that the position of the father has been lost and the roles are messed up.

You seem to see the right behavior of fathers as a result of the right behavior of other family members. Accepting this issue, do fathers themselves have a responsibility in the field of their educational development?

Definitely, in order for this puzzle piece to sit in its right place, it must be healthy. If its sides are damaged, it cannot fill the rest of the puzzle. He should be healthy and be in his right place. Neither Islam nor educational principles allow this. If it is one of the rights of the child that the father chooses a good name for the child, then he should also interfere in the choice of the field of study or the choice of a spouse. Or the same in the financial field, he should try and provide support, and on the other hand, when he was under financial pressure, the family should also be with him. If all the sides are arranged correctly, the father will know his position.

What advice do you have to solve the gaps?

Sometimes it is necessary to use Islamic sources such as the Qur'an and the Ahl al-Bayt in a topical manner once Let's review for ourselves, for example, if it's Father's Day, let's read the narrations and history of Ahl al-Bayt about the fatherhood of these loved ones, let's see Hazrat Ali (A) Imam Baqir and other Imams were like fathers. Let's look with these glasses or study the Quran with this look.